Stress x 10

The bad weather, absence of sleep and lack of exercise have amplified the stress in my life.  It can be hard to even breath when you feel squeezed from all sides, but breathing can be the most important thing you do in a stressful situation.  So I am taking some deep breaths.

I have also been trying some positive visualization as an alternative to my normal disaster forecasting.  At the moment, my favorite visualization exercise is to imagine your life (the one you are striving for) as a magazine spread.  Glossy happy photos, neat rows of text describing how capable, brilliant, brave, successful  you are (insert your favorite adjective) and a giant drop quote summing it all up.

The magazine spread I keep imagining is pretty elaborate, but looks a tiny bit like this...(below).  The main gist is that finally I have the spark I needed to move on, work through and start being who I want to be... It might seem silly, but this and a little breathing is helping me to stay positive and not give in to doubt and worry...

One of those days.. in a good way!

This time of year, wet and cold is the basic forecast we have in the Pacific Northwest. The meteorologist try to make it sound interesting using such phrases as  mist, mixed precipitation, light drizzle, balmy, light breeze and my favorite, sun breaks.  They all say the same thing, wet and cold.  My first winter here, I heard a forecast that said rain expected through March. This is really the Seattle winter forecast in a nutshell.

So, despite the "balmy mixed precipitation", today I bundled up Pudge and made my way to the Starbucks on the waterfront not too far from our house.  I had a grande nonfat iced mocha with a single shot of decaf, 2 pumps of chocolate and low ice (this is my drink of choice and yes, I am one of those people) and Pudge had a bottle.  I sat her in my lap and we looked out the window and chatted about the view.   (I chatted, she babbled and people starred).  It was really rather nice and I was enjoying myself immensely when out of nowhere, the most amazing thing happened... the sun came out.  (Seattle, winter... trust me sun is a big deal). So we started our day with coffee, a bottle and a walk along the beach. What could be better?
Okay maybe some heat :-)   

So good you want to lick the screen...

Lactation Cookies

I am a huge fan of food blogs. Actually, I like food books, food magazines and just food in general.  When my daily fare starts to look a little sad, I frequently turn to the web for inspiration. 1.) Because cupcake closeups look so good on my big screen and 2.) Because looking up a recipe at work really isn't goofing off. (I mean a girl has to eat and the grocery store is on the way home )


Lately I noticed my selection of food blogs had gotten a little stale, so I did some updating.  I wiped everything off my list except my favorites, 

• Cook and Eat
• Delicious Days
• Pinch My Salt

To those, I added my new favorites, 

• Cooking Light (not a blog, but great recipes)
• Honest Fare (the Pumpkin Pie Smoothie won me over)

My favorite recipe of 2010 was actually medicinal.  The Lactation Cookie Recipe was circulated all over the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit when Pudge was in the hospital.  Made with flax seed, oatmeal and brewer's yeast, the cookie is said to aid in lactation and help boost your milk supply. A medicinal cookie that helps me feed my little baby... sign me up.  Nowadays, Pudge is doing great, but I still love these cookies.  Aside from the health benefits nothing is funnier than handing someone a cookie and casually mentioning they are lactation cookies (preferably when they have a nice mouthful).  One gentleman at the hospital was concerned that having eaten a cookie he might start lactating.."um no!"  So if you are feeling wicked, or could actually benefit from the healthy ingredients, by all means give them a try. 

Vacation Day...

Had the day off today and spent it monkeying around with Pudge.

First Craft of the Season

I have always been a big fan of mobiles and opted for a blank DIY mobile for Pudge's room, so we could change the theme each season.  We had fall leaves up for a long time and I have been meaning to adapt an idea I saw at a Amuse, local stamp shop.  With a little tweaking I was able to create a little brown girl mobile, complete with afro puffs. 

2010: A Year in Review

2010 was a year that went by so fast, I can scarcely believe that it is over.  I started the year pregnant, ended the year with a new baby girl and along the way lost my grandmother, grew closer to my late mother  and opened up to possibilities I am just starting to comprehend.

Most of my biggest changes and events are related to our beautiful 7 month old daughter, aka Pudge. I can honestly say I have learned more about life in the past 7 months than I have learned in my entire 41 years.

Starting with....

1) The love and happiness I thought I had lost with the death of my mother, has always been with me and was just waiting for someone to help bring it back to the surface.

2) When you treat your body with kindness, love, good food and exercise it can produce results you never dreamed possible. (Pregnancy food aversions allowed me to stop eating sweets for 7 months and a desire for a healthy pregnancy turned me on to healthy eating.  The result I lost more than 20 pounds while pregnant and nourished the most amazing little being.

3) We really do create our own realities.  And now that I understand this, I intend to get out my purple crayon and draw the most awesome reality I can imagine.

4) Life is all about how we view it... Everything I thought was an obligation, is really a privilege or something to be grateful for....  (EXAMPLE: I miss my mother by I am so lucky to have had her as my mom.  I dislike leaving my daughter to go to work, but I am so grateful to have a good job with health insurance. I miss sleeping through the night, but getting up to nurse and change my daughter is an honor I would not trade for anything...)

5) My daughter laughs when she sneezes... somewhere in this simple silly action is the secret to a happy life.

So bring it on 2011... I have no idea where I am going, but for the first time I know:

• EVERYTHING is possible
• Love instead of sorrow for those I have lost
• Sometimes happiness is messy, sticky and smells like baby vomit, but every moment of it should be savored and enjoyed!
• Being kind to yourself is the first step to being kind to others
• Now is more important than the past or the future
• Life is good and I am truly blessed

I wish all of you a Happy New Year, may it be filled with Love, Happiness, Joy and Endless Possibilities.

Sorry for the long absence

Sorry for the long absence, getting accustomed to the realities of a new baby and a full time job. Little Haven is doing great and her mommy (love saying that) is learning to embrace the moment and do what she can.

The New Catalog...

Has anyone else seen the RL Gang from Ralph Lauren? An animated children's story that doubles as a catalog. Brilliant!!!!! I love the concept.. and I think I may need to buy a tweed hat with a pheasant feather for Haven.
Check it out..

Last night's 4 am finds...

New mothers don't sleep, they nap. Thank goodness for YouTube and Hulu at least we have something to laugh at come 4am when the little one decides she would much rather play with your fingers than sleep.

House Lust: Key West Cottage

This is the cutest little beach cottage.  It needs some work, but this house just screams potential.  There are three identical cottages that share a pool.  I would buy all three and go for the compound experience.  I would gut the interior and use lots of beach colors.  There would have to be some serious pink and of course one of these.

Fantasy Shopping Challenge # 1: A week at a summer rental

Fantasy Shopping Challenge #1: A week at a summer rental

You are planning to spend your week long vacation in August by renting a ________(apartment, cabin, cottage, boat, other) at ____________(coast, lake, beach, city). Your budget is $1200 for the entire week and if you have money left over you should add something fun or include an activity to enjoy on your vacation. (If you need to fly or take the train to your destination assume you are paying for it with frequently flyer miles and it is not part of your budget )You need to find your rental by July 31st .

Fantasy Shopping the Game

Fantasy Shopping the Game

My mother introduced me to shopping as a sport. She referred to it as sale-ing and we went at least once or twice a week. In the summers we “saled” at yard and estate sales, keeping to a fairly modest budget and capping it off with brunch or lunch. During the rest of the year we "saled" at stores like Bloomingdale’s Filenes Basement, Bonwit Tellers and Lowman’s; frequenting off season sales, discount rooms, coupons and clearance racks. My mother was a master at sale-ing and could easily turn $20 into an outfit. When money was tight we went fantasy shopping. We would invent an event such as a wedding or party and go shopping for a dress. We would recreate a fictional family or lifestyle and search open house to find the perfect home. These little games allowed us to enjoy the thrill of the hunt, without spending any money and this is really what fantasy shopping is all about.

After my mom passed away, I began to play my own version of fantasy shopping on the internet. I would give myself a scenario, a budget and a deadline and start shopping. The average games take less than an hour or about the amount of time in my lunch break. And with the Internet I could shop for virtually anything.

Examples:

• $450k | a loft style apartment in Chicago to serve as a home base for my new career as a content consultant for the Oprah magazine
• $100 | an outfit to wear to the book signing for my first novel
• $10k | a vintage car on EBay to cruise around town for the summer
• $50 | a birthday gift my mom would have given me
• $1 million Euro | a vacation home in Aix en Provence

Half the fun of shopping is bonding with friends, so I have decided to share my little game in the hopes anyone else wants to play.
So here it is…Fantasy Shopping Challenge #1

Have Moby Will Travel

The last few weeks we have really been able to enjoy going out with Haven.  We have been to lunch, the mall, the beach, grocery shopping and walks, all thanks to the Moby.  When my awesome Doula first told me about the Moby wrap, I thought there was no way on earth I would be able to fold that long piece of fabric into a wearable carrier safe enough to carry my beloved child.  Just a few weeks later I am an avid Moby user.  Haven and I wear the Moby around the house, so she can sleep and chill, while I eat, blog, read, watch TV or brush my teeth.  At the grocery store, I can actually shop and even push a cart.  The Moby is my go to tool when Haven is fussy and just needs to be close to me.  When she is bigger and can hold her head up, I will move her to a sling, but for now the Moby is like my third arm.  The material is so soft and warm; I even bought her a Moby blanket and matching hat for our stroller excursions.

A moment of zen from the garden

Baby girl is finally on a schedule, just not for our time zone.  She sleeps for some nice stretches during the day but catches a second wind around 4am most mornings.  Savoring every moment and even the sleepy ones and hoping that little by little she adjusts to Pacific time.  For now, we rock in the chair and watch lots of Hulu and Netflix(online).

The other day I did get a chance to walk through our garden which is looking amazing.

What happens when you don't see Avatar...

When Avatar first came out in the theaters the hype surrounding it was overwhelming.  Friends told me I had to see it, the news media said I had to see it, complete strangers told me I had to see it and did I see it?  NOPE!  Now I am a total Science Fiction nut, so you would think I would join the rush wait in line and blow my mind 3D style.    It came out and stranger than strange, I had no interest.  As a result months of jokes, parodies and cultural references went over my head. Finally stuck in a hospital room on bed rest, I  decided I could sit through the movie (being literally tied to a bed  with an IV).  I really liked it, although did not see why it deserved all the the attention.  Granted I did not see it in 3D, but it was good , but not the mind trip I had been led to believe.  (If you want a SciFi mind trip, see Moon )  At any rate, now that I have seen it, all the parodies and jokes make sense.  Below is my current favorite, although a little offensive. 

House Lust

I love this unit in the Hamptons, especially the light and color. I love to see old motels converted into funtional and cute little apartments. There is one near me with views of the lighthouse and beach.  I often thought an apartment like this would make a great summer place.  The apartments are often tiny, but really how much room do you need when you will be spending most of your time outside. 

Loving these links....

• It's a small world after all | Engaged couple cross paths as toddlers
• I absolutely do not need this set, but it sure is cute.
• I am totally infatuated with View Masters, did you know you can actually make your own.
• Just got birth announcements we ordered from Tiny Prints.  I will definitely be doing custom cards again..  VERY FUN!
• Trying to improve my knitting skills, I really want to make these for my daughter.

House Lust

I have a thing for real estate and fall in and out of loves with homes.  I frequently search the MLS listing for my dream house and it is not uncommon for me to have a new favorite each week.  This week I am lusting after this house. I mean really 1.6 million is a bargain for this beauty.

Addicted to Books

I find the tactile experience of a reading a book, just as enjoyable as the book contents. Caress the cover, crack open the spine, leave through the pages, feel the weight of the paper, smell the ink, admire the font and lovingly trace the pictures. After years of loving books, I do this unconsciously whenever I look at a book. (Much to the shock of book store clerks who can find it quite pervy). Stories and content are lovely, but I have been known to buy a book based solely on the weight of the paper, or quality of the pictures. If the content is even vaguely interesting and I have money to spare, I will most likely buy it. I used to justify such purchases as saving independent bookstores, supporting the economy, or as far as addictions go, I could be buying cigarettes. Of course now the beauty of being in your 40's is that if I want something, I don't need a justification, I just do it... (that should be a motto... Are you in your 40's? Then JUST DO IT!)

All of this leads me to my current bookshelves, laden with gorgeous books in desperate need of my attentions. Revisiting your bookshelf, is like getting to know yourself again. I love food fiction, superheroes, decorating coffee table picture books, software manuals, Oprah style self improvement books, marketing and branding bestsellers, children's stories, crafting books of any sort, gardening books with great photography, any cookbook, coming of age memoirs and any good story that will make me cry, laugh or sigh. I find myself quite impressed by my tastes but more often than not wondering how a woman with so many books on organization can still be such a slob. In looking at my book case, I wonder...

• Which 10 books I would take with me a on desert island
• Which books I could not live without..
• My top 10 stories of all times
• What are my classics
• What would I put on my summer reading list
• What books would I recommend to my daughter
• Why don't I have a copy of To Kill a Mocking Bird and I Know Why the Cage Bird Sings?
• When was the last time I actually cooked something from Julia Child's book. 
• And why someone with a librarian degree does not even bother to shelf books by title or subject

I suspect my revisiting my bookshelves will lead to purchasing more books, but really there are so many worse things I could be addicted to...

The New Little Brown Girl in My Life

Our daughter Haven Lark entered the world two months early and left me speechless, in love and totally spell bound.  Of course I new the final result would be a baby, but I had suspended all expectations and was just waiting to meet her.   Feeling so blessed to be a part of her life.  She was a wish for so long, one I was not sure would ever be fulfilled and now that she is here, I know that anything and everything is possible.